Just discovered Mark Manson, blogging on relationships for Business Insider(?). I suppose business people are human and must, at some point in their time off, have relationships with real life people. Either way this is some great advise, not only for romantic relationship, but also for friendships as well. Case in point:

Successful couples accept and understand that some conflict is inevitable, that there will always be certain things they don’t like about their partners or things they don’t agree with, and that this is fine. You shouldn’t need to feel the need to change somebody in order to love them. And you shouldn’t let some disagreements get in the way of what is otherwise a happy and healthy relationship.The truth is, trying to resolve a conflict can sometimes create more problems than it fixes. Some battles are simply not worth fighting. And sometimes the most optimal relationship strategy is one of “live and let live.”

Source: Dating habits people think are toxic – Business Insider

His companion piece to the above is also worth a read and a reflection. This piece too is a must read, but this part stood out to me on not holding your friendships or relationships hostage:

What You Should Do Instead: It’s fine to get upset at your partner or to not like something about them. That’s called being a normal human being. But understand that committing to a person and always liking a person are not the same thing. One can be committed to someone and not like everything about them. One can be eternally devoted to someone yet actually be annoyed or angered by their partner at times. On the contrary, two partners who are capable of communicating feedback and criticism towards one another, only without judgment or blackmail, will strengthen their commitment to one another in the long-run.

Source: 6 Toxic relationship habits most people think are normal

Relationships aren’t easy. Human beings are complicated. I read somewhere that the secret to any great relationship is stubbornness – basically two people who refuse to give up on each other. No one is perfect. We are flawed and we aren’t going to be each other’s next best thing to sliced bread. If we are, expect to have to deal with a little bit of mold here and there.

The magic is in seeing the good and the bad in your partner and choosing both. The wild card is wether or not your partner feels the same way. But that you can’t control and you can’t predict. Focus on what you bring to the relationship.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes:

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>